today’s rant: sea salt, originally 10/23/07

i was at the mall last week because i wanted to buy some socks.  right now, some of my socks have holes in them, so i was looking to upgrade, like foster parents with a shitty kid.  as i was walking along inside the mall, some lady wanted to sell me some skin care products from the dead sea.  she made me hold my hands out in the shape of a bowl and she scooped some sea salt into my hands.  she had me wash my hands with the sea salt.  someone tell me if this actually works, because in my opinion, that line of reasoning that "salt cleans your hands" follows along with "semen is good hair gel".  she had me look down in the bowl where i was "washing" my hands.  she said "look at all that filth in there", to which i replied, "yeah...it's dissolved salt.  that's what happens to salt when it is dissolved."  she also asked how my hands felt.  i replied "honestly, it feels like i have salt resin on my hands.  that's how they feel.  is this clean?  because it feels greasy."

she tried to pitch to me the idea that sea salt was better than using soap because soap can dry out skin.  now she was really insulting my intelligence.  if soap can dry out skin, what makes her think that a mineral that absorbs water, such as sea salt, can do better?  and what did this magic sea salt cost for a jar about the size of a pound of butter?  $49.99.  i desperately wanted to ask her what made this different from sea salt you can buy at... oh, let's say, a supermarket.  instead of asking that, i told her that i was out of a job and money was tight and that i wasn't that superficial.  in retrospect, i should've asked "what else does the $50 get me?  because i'm single and lonely" to really fuck with her mind.

well, i'm not out of a job anymore.  new place looks nice.  closer to my apartment, and i get out at 4, but i got to wake up and show up earlier and lunch is only 30 min.  eh, whatever.  it's better money than i was making last week.  james?  how come i found 2 jobs in the time it took you to find 0?  you lazy fuck. stop playing warcraft and email some resumes.