i'm so out of touch with pop culture. i love it. it makes everything seem relatively stupid to me, giving me better self esteem. example: the billboard hot 100. except for "empire state of mind", it's a veritable who's who of what is wrong with the music industry. but i just found out "dollhouse" was cancelled. no rest of the season after january (just in time for 24, coincidence?) i'm a joss whedon fan. my adolescence centered around the buffyverse, sad as that may sound. maybe that's why joss hasn't been able to keep another series going, 'cause WB was giving him better props than FOX could possibly muster with "firefly" and "dollhouse". well, with joss and eliza dushku possibly getting some free time now, maybe the character "faith" can get her own series pitched. buffy was over in '03, angel in '04, has too much time passed?
ok, time for the real gripe. 6 days ago, i experience the worse wedding i've ever been to. sure, i got all dressed up nice and acted all happy to be there, but fuck. i even broke out my silver cufflinks, so at least i tried to make it seem like i gave a shit about the occasion. i've made sure to document what i didn't like about the entire experience just to make sure barbara and i do not repeat the many mistakes we observed.
1. the engagement ring cost $10k and looked like a blooming onion
2. the plasma tvs at the receptoin cost $5k
3. the 150 women who were invited to the wedding were also all invited to the bridal shower, 40 showed up.
4. the bridal shower cost $1500...for chinese food
5. the wedding was on a tuesday
6. the wedding was in lindenhurst, the reception was in floral park --> mid-week rush hour traffic
7. the groom is an asshole
8. the bridesmaid dress place is EVIL. want to feel worse about your self image, have some snobby 50-something year old lady tell you that your dress size is 2 sizes larger than what you're currently wearing.
9. the MOH is a bitch on the verge of divorce, and she gave a speech about the newlyweds
10. the bachelorette party was supposed to be at a wine bar. wrong!
11. someone in the wedding party did not want the bride and groom to marry. an anonymous letter was sent to the bride's home saying so. someone should have listened.
12. the groom dropped the bridal gifts in a storage facility, breaking a lot of stuff. he was in a rush to get to a funeral. (speaking of funerals, he showed up to a wake in sweatpants and sneakers)
13. the bride refers to herself in the 3rd person
14. the groom got high before the ceremony w/ the groomsmen. they took visine to clear their eyes before the priest came in. hey bride, your husband had to be high to marry you. what does that say about your prospects of children?
15. the limo carrying the bridesmaids rear-ended a truck (attribute this to #6)
16. in the best man's speech, he mentioned a vacation to malta he took with the groom, forgetting that the groom cheated on his now-wife 3 times on that vacation.
17. most importantly, not good beer at the reception.
now taking bets for how long they will last
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