in 1996, i first set eyes on a self-flushing toilet. my reaction was about the same as beavis and butthead's reaction when they saw a bunch in the public restroom when they saw old faithful in "beavis and butthead do america". over the past 18 years, touchless technology has evolved in public restrooms. since the 90s, we now see motion sensors on sinks, soap dispensers, paper towel dispensers, automatic hand dryers, and even the doors open by themselves for the handicapped. i am waiting for the logical next step where robots just pull down our pants for us.
come to think of it, would it not logically have made more sense just to create that first? i think the main reason for making all this touch-free technology in the bathroom is to minimize the transfer of germs from our hands to our cocks, balls, pussies, and assholes. would it not make the most sense to FIRSTLY invent a machine that pulls down our pants and wipes up after us? that way, we would not even need to put our hands anywhere near our genitals and bungholes, and therefore be no need to wash our hands.
a week and a half ago, it snowed 2 inches in south carolina. my work closed. i, being a born and bred new yorker, find this fascinating because this is unheard of. 2 inches is all it takes for the state and businesses to go "HOLY SHIT! STOCK UP ON PROPANE AND MOUNTAIN DEW!!! WE'RE NOT GONNA MAKE IT 'TIL SPRING!!!" it amazes me that the state will shut the fuck down because they don't invest in snow plows. for those unfamiliar with long island infrastructure, we are made up of a bunch of "towns" which have an elected board to locally govern and maintain 5 or so smaller towns or villages, some of which have their own elected officials. anyhow, as part of property and local taxes, each town has its own public works department. part of which is dedicated to maintaining their fleet of snow plows. each town has their own plows. there is none of that here in SC. therefore, 2 inches may as well be 2 feet to the people who are not used to driving in snow. it is very laughable having to say at the end of the day "i got a snow day for this? you'd get your ass kicked at work in NY for missing a day for 2 inches of snow." it takes a blizzard or, i learned in 2012, a hurricane to shut down work in NY. otherwise, you're a fucking pussy.
who do you think had a worse weekend last week: philip seymore hoffman or peyton manning?
i know that social media is a revolution of the sharing of ideas, but i do not recommend griping about your job on your social media outlets WHILE YOU ARE STILL EMPLOYED FOR THAT COMPANY, unless you just don't care about getting fired. in the fall of 2012, i reached that point and wrote about at the time. i legitimately wanted out and did not care anymore. however, if you have an overwhelming need to pay your bills, i advise against it.
