when did "can you name a city in <state name> without the letter <vowel>? bet you can't" get so popular? i bet that if you have seen any of these on your facebook newsfeed, you have immediately thought of five cities off the top of your head if you live in that state, and if you gave it another minute, you could list fifteen others. this is just as dumb as the "how many squares are in this picture? bet you can't find them all" bullshit pictures or the dumb math questions that end with "84% of people get this wrong". it seems that americans are in no short abundance of stupid things to share on their facebook wall. yes, i'm referring to YOU! you too, angry musthachioed person the mirror!
you know that "hide" button on the newsfeed next to each item? i think it would be nice if when you hid something on your feed, an anonymous notification should be sent to the person who you blocked with the following statement:
"one of your facebook friends has permanently hid your posts on their facebook newsfeed. the following reason was given:"
and for the reason, you'd have a choice of 1) misleading, 2) offensive, 3) illegal, 4) degrading to women, 5) libelous, 6) stupid, 7) homoerotic, 8) swedish, 9) prophesied by Nostradamus, or 10) all of the above.
this is my theory on economics and politics:
the stock market's performance in inversely proportional to the level of
confidence americans have in their government. for example:
Bill Clinton gets a hummer in the White House = Dow Jones hits 11,000
Relief that we're getting a new President = dot-com bubble burst
The comedy riot that was GW Bush's two terms = Dow Jones hits 14,000
Relief that we're getting a new President = housing bubble burst
Credit downgrade, Obamacare, and sequesters = Dow Jones breaks another record
am I detecting a pattern?
this is not a "Democrat vs. Republican" thing. this is a "government"
thing. putting a donkey sticker or an elephant sticker on it does not
change how it works. all I'm say is let's stop the bickering and ride
this stock market wave for all it is worth. i know i am.
in response to the news of elisabeth hasselbeck leaving the view, scientists have predicted a 548% higher occurrence of the phrases "cunt on the loose! there's a cunt on the loose! hide the children!"
i think the vatican should invest in a space program. i'm surprised they haven't done it yet with all the money they have. think about it. they want to be closer to god. what better way then to strap the next pope into a rocket with a monkey and have them go meet god? i'm sure god will pick them up once they get out of the atmosphere. wouldn't that be awesome if that was in the new pope's job description?
