I think it is cute that there are people who still hang flags in support of former-President Tangerine Treason on their cars and in front of their houses. I have never seen such public devotion to an elected official out of power in the United States. My reptilian brain sometimes think of defacing them, but then I decide that it is not worth the effort to commit a crime to bring petty smite. I settle for standing, pointing, and laughing at these people. There’s nothing illegal about that. Rest assured, they deserve ridicule. These people actively supported bigotry in power or were comfortable enough with it to ignore it and vote for him anyway. Unfortunately, it’s not like I can ridicule half of my coworkers whenever I want. I need to function with these people. It’s a weird balancing act between with my morals and opinions on one side and my professionalism and career on the other.
I also find it adorable how Republicans are shitting their pants over critical race theory: the teaching that racism is ingrained in American law and institutions. That fragility over their whiteness and risk to their inherent power is so fucking cute. Bless their hearts. From my point of view, when I learned about Long Island history, I would have appreciated to have been told that mortgage riders in Levittown specifically prohibited black people from moving there after World War II. I had to find that out way later. Now that I know, I am not shitting my pants. I am reconciling with that part of Long Island’s history. That serves as a pretty strong piece of evidence based on my upbringing and exposure that critical race theory holds merit.
Want to know what is also cute? Republicans cannot seem to decide on which manner of fraud they think caused Cheetos McHairpiece to lose. Lack of signature verification, too many ballot drop boxes, ballots dumped in ditches, voting machine hacking, changes to the voting laws that were to advantageous for people they don’t like, Hugo Chavez… it’s a long list.
While I was driving to an Italian restaurant one day, I passed a home that had a 6- or 7-foot tall wooden sculpture of a cross on their lawn with a bald eagle on top of it and the word “TRUMP” written down the vertical part of the cross. This is why, I’m pretty sure, that they have that part about the golden (or in this case, orange) calf in the bible, about worshiping false idols. I’d be ok with this if it just meant that they wanted to hang Trump upside down from a cross while he is nailed to it and a bald eagle is shitting in his mouth. Somehow, I do not think that is what they were going for, though.
According to “Futurism”, scientists want to use artificial intelligence to talk to whales. I do not think that is a good idea. I guarantee that the first thing they will decipher is “why are you killing us?” As the dominant species on the planet, I think any intelligent conversation with animals will be very awkward. Chickens would say “my uterus hurts” and “get me out of this cage”.
To all of the people who stormed the Capital building on January 6, I want you to know that your favorite cable news channel, Fox News, has people working for their network who will alter their narrative and actively deny what you did. They are going to say the FBI, anti-fascists, and Black Lives Matter protestors did it. They will disavow you. How does that make you feel? You know that lady who was shot and killed by Capital Police? What do you think they are going to start saying about her? She’s a martyr for you now, but given time, they will say she never existed as part of a false flag operation.
Now that I’ve said something serious to you patriotic folk, I am going to make fun of you, because nothing says “patriotism” like a “Camp Auschwitz” shirt. I mean, come on. If you are so patriotic, why did some of you wear a “Camp Auschwitz” shirt? Auschwitz was run by Nazis. They were the bad people the country fought against in World War II… only after we were provoked by the Japanese, but that’s besides the point. Can you possibly see that wearing Nazi paraphernalia could make you look like the bad guys? You see that. Right? Right? Or you can just save us a bunch of time and just admit to us that you hate anyone who isn’t a white Christian? Then I don’t have to ask why some of you wore the stupid fucking shirt. The best thing to happen at the January 6 riot was a lady wearing a “Don’t Tread On Me” flag around her getting trampled to death. The irony is fucking beautiful. But in all seriousness, what the hell is with that fucking snake flag? It looks like someone living in the back woods ran out of red and blue paint, drew a squiggly line on a blank flag, and pissed on it.
Do not get me wrong. I have been pissed off enough at the federal government to want to just say “fuck it’ and start over. That’s why the founders threw the “Articles of Confederation” in the garbage. It’s not unprecedented. The difference between you and me is the same difference between you and BLM protesters. Their grievances, anger, and rioting are based on history. Yours is based on a lie. It’s a lie. It was planted in your brains months before the election and steadily spoon fed to you leading up and way after. Everyone was told “it’s going to be a fraud” months ahead of time on a continuous basis, and you believed it. You failed to think critically that an orange alien that looks like an upside down candy corn could be anything by omniscient. You’ve had your audits. You’ve had your recounts. Georgia had 2 recounts. Yet you read these words and don’t budge. You don’t care. You are mediocre. You are dumb. You blindly accepted what your corporate-backed politicians and your dumb family members told you without a second thought. You know what? Go to Florida, secede from the rest of the country, and go fuck yourselves.
