Today's rant: Unite the what?

It seems to me that once or twice a decade, California is set on fire.  I like fire, I like big fires, but state-wide fires are just a smidge excessive.

To me, the “Unite the Right” is a great opportunity for white Christian people to bitch and moan that their white privilege isn’t good enough.  Just so any readers of my shit knows, I really don’t like using the phrase “white privilege” because I wasn’t exposed to the phrase as a kid.  It’s still new to me, but I think white supremacy falls into the category of “white privilege.”  Another reason I don’t like the phrase is because I mistype it 90% of the time.  Fucking liberals.  Though honestly, I’m torn about how to react to these uniters of the righters. (aww, fuck you, spellcheck.  “Uniters” sounds like a word to me, so I’m keeping it) One side of me wants to ignore them and not validate their negative rhetoric.  Another side of me says that ignoring them also ignores the underlying problem:  they’re racist assholes who shouldn’t be allowed to let their ideas (or genetics) spread.  I so wish I could say “fuck the 1^st Amendment and cut their tongues off”, but that’s a dangerous precedent.  Although I must say, if the circumstances of the death that happened last year were reversed now, and one of those goofy tiki torch-carrying bungholes was killed in a riot, you bet your fucking ass I wouldn’t feel bad about it.  Yes, some people deserve to die.  I don’t get white supremacy.  It sounds like genetic and evolutionary stagnation to me.  Well if that’s what they want, fine by me, as long as they die off quietly and not bother the rest of us.  Weed out the inferior mentality and let us evolve as a society.  It’s their own logic about superiority turned around against them, and I fucking love it!  If you are one of these people trying to unite your right or whatever, here is my piece:  You are all really fucking stupid.  What you are doing is wrong.  You have way too much time on your hands to be worrying about other groups of people threatening your precious white privilege.  You deserve to have your pubic hair set on fire with those cute little tiki torches that you carry.  The universe does not care that your skin pigmentation is bland or care for your self-inflated sense of superiority. 

So some guy who works at an airport stole an airplane and crashed it into an island over the weekend.  HOLY SHIT!  I’d like to share some excerpts from the New York Daily News article I just read because they are spectacular!

-          “Russell swiped the commercial aircraft from Sea-Tac International Airport on Friday and performed some startling acrobatic stunts before going down.”  Now I wish I saw these stunts.

-          “As a flight controller tried to convince him to safely land the plane, Russell wondered aloud about whether he had enough fuel to make it to the Olympics, spoke about the view, and said he had a lot of people who cared about him.”  THE OLYMPICS!  Those were 6 months ago!

-          “He complimented the controller: ‘You are very calm, collect, poised,’ he said.”  At least he was polite.

-          “A friend who is a former co-worker told TV station KIRO that Russell was not happy with his job.”  Well what a fucking sendoff Mr. Russell did!

-          “Observers wondered how, 17 years after the Sept. 11 terror attacks, someone can simply take a passenger plane from a major U.S. airport.”  Oooh, I can answer that!  It’s because the TSA doesn’t work, duh!

-          “Russell's responsibilities included towing and pushing aircraft for takeoff and gate approach, de-icing them, and dealing with baggage.”  Apparently, he dealt with too much baggage.

Living in the south now, there tend to be more religious folk down here.  Some in particular put little signs on their lawns for car drivers to read as they pass.  These are small signs, about the size that you see advertising home buying or more of those fucking signs.  These religious people sometimes put a sign up that says “Thank you, JESUS”.  The idea of putting up a sign like that puzzles me.  Do they really thing Jesus Christ can see the sign?  Jesus Christ doesn’t even own a car!  Do they think He’ll be slighted if He doesn’t see their affirmation in His teachings and miracles?  Why not write the sign in Aramaic?  Jesus didn’t know the English language or alphabet when He was nailed to a tree, and I’ve never heard a Pope say that He took a program like Rosetta Stone postmortem, so I doubt He can even read the sign.  I don’t think it has to do with actually communicating with our Lord and Savior.  I think it’s more a sense of self-righteousness, trying to tell the rest of us that they are suuuuuch good people because of their faith that they have to rub it in our faces.  God, don’t these people remember that pride/vanity is a deadly sin, too?

As the midterm elections start inching closer and closer, like a dick poking you in the back while you are being spooned, I thought I would share a piece of general advice.  If you see or hear an advertisement that is not for a product or service, and you hear or read the words “paid for by”, someone is lying to you for the purpose of political gain.  It doesn’t matter where on the political spectrum they are from; they are lying to you.  Get your information elsewhere.

The pessimist in me says that Trump will be re-elected because 1) voters are too stupid to do otherwise and 2) I don’t see any serious non-Republican contenders to run against him for the 2020 election this early on.  We really are an uneducated people if we swallow all the lies told to us, refuse to vilify unethical behavior, reward the liars for it, and cannot find anyone smarter to do the job better (yes, I’d say the same for Hillary).  If it couldn’t happen for W’s 2^nd term, it sure-as-shit won’t happen for Trump’s.  I keep remembering that the last two Republican presidents the US had lost the popular vote and only won via the Electoral College vote, which is all that matters constitutionally.   Fuck us.  It’s time for a refresher.  We’ve tried electing lawyers, we’ve tried electing veterans, we’ve tried electing businesspeople; let’s try something else.  It’s time to pick people who do not have a vested personal interest in gaining governmental power.  Ironically, I’d say let’s try electing smart people like teachers or engineers or doctors because of their education, but they’re too smart to do something as stupid as run for public office.

By all media representations of the current Pope, he seems like a good guy.  So, after 1000 kids were diddled by 300 priests in Pennsylvania for decades and decades, and the church did everything in its power to cover it up, at least he said something.  He released a letter condemning that kind of abuse.  I read the letter, and I read a few news stories about it.  What I did not read is any kind of plan about what to do about Catholic sex abuse.  The only thing I saw mentioned in the letter was “fasting and prayer”.  Um, well, I work in quality control.  Usually, if there is a problem, we have to identify the cause and (pay attention, church) make a plan to fix it and follow through with making sure the plan works.  If I went to a customer and said “All of the screws are falling out because they are the wrong size.  We’re going to fast and pray about it,” some contracts would get terminated pretty damn quickly.  I know that solution sounds stupid, because it is, but no more stupid than 3 years ago when pastor and mayor of Jackson, MS Tony Yarber, facing crumbling infrastructure, said on the Twitter (and this is why I’m glad that Twitter is not legally-binding doctrine) “Yes....I believe we can pray potholes away. Moses prayed and a sea opened up.”  On an unrelated note, he did not win the primary in 2017 when he was due for reelection.

So, supposedly President Dumbo Trump said that the market would crash if Democrats were to impeach him.  Firstly, Dumbo, I seriously doubt you’ll get impeached for paying off porn stars because 1) your Republican friends won’t allow it and 2) the American people are too stupid to elect enough Senators and Representatives in November who will allow it.  Secondly, I admire your ego because it makes me feel better as a human being, but contrary to what you tell yourself in the mirror every morning, the stock market does not depend on you.  Correction, it doesn’t directly depend on you.  I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again:  my economic theory is that stock market performance is inversely proportional to Americans’ confidence in government.  Bill Clinton blowjob = Dow Jones 11,000.  Relief that Clinton is getting out of office = tech bubble burst.  W’s 2^nd term in office = Dow Jones 14000.  Relief that W is getting out of office = housing bubble burst.  Trump so far = Dow Jones 25000.  I want him to keep fucking up and saying the insane, bat shit things he’s saying because my 401(k) LOVES IT!  However, if we get someone competent to sit as President, start cashing out & save it for the black market.  Anyway, as I’ve said, Dumbo, you’re not directly tied to the market.  You’re just a variable in the cycle.  I’ll tell you someone who is infinitely more important to the market than you will ever be and on whom our economy truly relies:  Santa Claus.

Today’s rant: 2 months worth

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