last week, i read a quote that i thought was truly stupid, involving mitt romney and his idea that paying slightly less than 14% on federal tax was acceptable to him. that was even dumber than his claiming that his father marched with martin luther king jr. today, i read a quote that put romney's words to shame. there is a new sheriff of stupidtown. i present missouri congressman todd akin.
when asked about abortion rights for victims of sexual assault who were impregnated, he said the following:
"It seems to me, first of all, from what I understand from doctors, that's really rare. If it's a legitimate
rape, the female body has ways to shut that whole thing down."
let's set aside everyone's ideology on the subject of abortion for a minute, because that is not what this rant is about. when i read that quote and listen to it in my head, my brain hurts. specifically, the left side of my brain hurts. that is where logic is processed. right around the word "shut", i feel like i need a couple advil because a couple of neurons are unable to process what i'm reading into something that makes sense.
WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU THINKING? you're running for an elected office, you retarded son of a bitch! it's one thing to ask for a president's birth certificate. it's something else entirely to presume you know how the female reproductive system works. what doctors are you taking advice from? dr. doom? dr. dolittle?
why didn't you run this past your wife? you may not know this, but i think she's a woman. there is a 94% chance she knows how the female reproductive system functions. if you asked her under which circumstances the female body can "shut that whole thing down", she'd rightfully and justifiably slap your testicles with a frat house paddle for your own good before explaining everything wrong with your question.
people of missouri, this person is close to being able to represent you. there is something wrong with this senario. may i suggest public shaming at the base of the arch? rotten tomatoes and paintball?
to everyone who has read the quote and gave it a second look because something did not quite add up when you were trying to understand it, CONGRATULATIONS! YOU ARE SMARTER THAN AN ELECTED OFFICIAL WITH AN ENGINEERING DEGREE!!!
