how to tell what someone is doing in the bathroom.
let's say you're at work and the guy sitting next to you says "i'll be right back". for the purposes of this study, let's not assume that they're going to say "i gotta take a piss" or "i gotta take a shit", because then it would defeat the act of guessing what they're doing while their out.
side note: when you think about it, the phrase "i gotta take a shit" is not as disgusting as you may think. it's way better than saying, "i gotta squat down, wrap my arms around the back of my knees to brace myself, and defecate about 1 pound of brown, stinky food waste from what i ate yesterday." when faced with the two options, i'm sure you'll opt for "i gotta take a shit".
ok, back to business. depending on the time that your coworker is out, you should be able to tell in a fair amount of detail what he's doing. if he comes back in 1 minute or less, he took a piss and didn't wash his hands. if he comes back in 1-2 minutes, he took a piss and washed his hands. if he comes back in 2-3 minutes, he had to wait for a toilet to open up. any longer than 5 minutes, he's taking a shit.
have you ever noticed on "24" that no one ever eats, sleeps, pisses, or shits? i simply assume that all the main characters shit in the final 15 minutes before the timeline of a season's first episode begins.
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