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Monday, January 9, 2012

today's rant: butterfly meadow, originally 9/10/09

at first glance, i thought that a gift registry is something simple.  you pick out what you'd like to receive, and people buy it for you.  this idea is ok until you find a couple who has different needs when it comes to gifts.  take for example barbara and i.  she likes aesthetics and i am more practical.  for some reason, she has become obsessed with the butterfly meadow collection at macy's.  we have already received some parts of that set.  specifically, the bathroom set.  right now, she is online thinking about changing around the plates, tea set, and dessert set that we registered for.  now she wants it all from the butterfly meadow collection.

first of all, why do we need fucking chips and dip shit with butterflies on them?  i was ok with making the bathroom kinda faggy, but why does it have to spill out into the kitchen?  and for the love of god, WHO GIVES A SHIT IF THE SHOWER CURTAIN HANGERS MATCH THE DESSERT PLATES?!  how bad does someone need to take a shit that they will take their slice of pie running into the bathroom like a marathon runner with prostate problems seeing a toilet at the end of the run, sit down, splatter out something nasty, then go "wow, those curtain hangers go perfectly with my strawberry rhubarb pie"?

relationships are all about compromise, right?  ok.  for every piece of butterfly meadow shit besides what's in the bathroom, i want to get something tailored for me.  you want the tea set?  i want a lightsaber remote control.  you want the chips and dip bowl?  i want a kegerator.  you want the dessert plates?  i want a monkey in a suit to serve me coke while i watch football.

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