who wrote that god awful taylor swift song "love story"? for that matter, who the fuck is taylor swift? sounds like a porn star name. yes it does. that is a shitty-ass song. in chorus class, they teach you how to breathe correctly and when to breathe while singing. this is a supposedly professionally produced song, and she's breathing so often i think she's in labor. holy shit, she wrote it. that's it. boycotting her music. it's one thing to sing a poorly-written song (a la the american idol victory song), it's another thing to poorly sing a poorly-written song (a la justin timberfuck), but to poorly sing your own poorly-written song should be illegal. call the EPA, this bitch is polluting our brains.
is it cheating if you spread peanut butter on your testicles and have your dog lick it off, but then your dog gets salmonella? (wow, i actually got a "road trip" reference in this thing)
at least michael phelps is no where as bad as floyd landis, the tour de france guy who wins the award of biggest douche in america.
"mr. landis, your urine shows you has 11 times the normal about of testosterone in your body when you were in the tour de france"
"yes, i know. my body naturally produces large amounts of testosterone."
"no, you don't understand. the testosterone we found was synthetic."
"...yes, i know. my body naturally produces large amounts of synthetic testosterone. i was just getting to that."
"uh, yeah. give us back your title."
i know it's not "laser hair removal", but it deserves attention. has anyone ever heard of a laser breast lift? does that sound like something a woman would want to get for valentine's day? WBLI thinks so. to my fellow long islanders, if your driving on sunrise highway in west babylon, please give WBLI the finger when you pass them.
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