let's get started. my brother left early this morning to go on a vacation to the dominican republic. being that he has a shitty job and just graduated college, i'd think he'd do something a little bit more sensible with the money he has. that's not to say that he shouldn't be able to take a vacation when he wants, but i can think of better ways to handle that money. i'd feel better about his financial handlings if he actually stopped playing world of warcraft for five fucking minutes and would call a company's human resources office to set up a job interview. in the meantime, his degree is going to be collecting dust in his bed-side table drawer.
now that he's away, that means that i have to keep an eye out for his tortoise. now i have to fucking remember to turn on his heat lamps in the morning, or else it could die. that's a lot of goddamn pressure! i'm lucky if i remember to shower in the morning. fuck it, why didn't he take his tortoise with him? i'm sure it's warm in the caribbean. just pack that fucker in one of those paris hilton chihuahua bags and sneak it through customs.
i fucking hate it when people give their life stories while they are contestants on "who wants to be a millionaire". as soon as that merideth woman finishes asking a question, they start talking about what their children are learning in school or something they vaguely remember discussing one evening over dinner. "who was the first president of the united states? was it john addams, george washington, thomas jefferson, or steve urkel?" "well, i remember that he could never tell a lie...unlike my ex-wife. she lied to me all the time. this one time, we were in bed together and she told me that she was born a man. boy howdy, with a lie like that, she sure as hell could never be the first president. by the way, is the show going to comp my parking outside? i mean, i never thought i'd have to pay $30 for the first hour just to park my car in a garage..." JUST ANSWER THE FUCKING QUESTION!!!
besides that on millionaire, the thing that also irks me is the idiocy of people to think out loud before choosing the 50/50 lifeline. every single time someone narrows their guesses to two choices, then uses the lifeline, the remaining two answers are the ones they just thought were the answers. they gain nothing but a need to get kicked in the face.
as usual, my laptop decides to start breaking down immediately after the warranty expires. just as with my previous 2 laptops, the power connection where the hole meets the power cord is crapping out. it's like when you fuck for too long and the hole just gets worn out and loosens up too much. things start falling out and nothing stays in as much as it did before. time to start thinking about what parts to sell on ebay.
i went to jc penney today for a pair of black jean shorts. as i approached the downward escalator, the signs said "up: children, outdoors". conversely, on the opposite side of the store with the upward escalators, the signs said "down: men's, customer service". at least the people who built the store are equal-opportunity employers. not everyone would hire a dyslexic sign designer.
i start my real job next week. hopefully i can keep up with writing this shit.
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