you know what sucks? hiccups. from what i've seen, it varies from one person to another, but when it happens to me, i'm totally fucked. mine get so bad that it actually hurts. it hurts to the point where i want to take a sledgehammer and just wail away at my mid-section. even worse...my hiccups last for days on end. it's like having a period without the blood. when i have the hiccups, don't fucking talk to me, because anything that comes out of my mouth is incoherent. i've had them since yesterday and i know that they aren't going away until tuesday at least. just in time for them to return at thanksgiving dinner.
from what i understand, many people don't know what the hiccups are or where they come from. well, i'm related to two registered nurses, and the secret has been passed on to the family. here's what happens. if you masturbate too hard or masturbate excessively (5 or so times daily) and your breathing so hard that you accidentally skip a breath or breathe at the wrong time, you get the hiccups. seriously, think about. where do you feel the hiccups? in the diaphram area, right between your lungs and your cash & prizes. there's an energy exchange between the two organs, and that energy goes through the diaphragm. when one of those is out of sync with the other, then the energy exchange gets fucked up and seriously messes with your diaphragm, causing it to spasm. therefore, if you want to stop the hiccups, stop masturbating. and yes, that's why i have the hiccups for 3-5 days on end.
anyfuck, happy turkey day. if you're vegetarian, happy tofurkey day.
Then explain how your daughter has the hiccups for hours on end, and she's still in utero?!
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