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Thursday, December 29, 2011

alphabet, originally 8/19/06

and now for your learning pleasure, i'd like to present the George W. Bush updated alphabet.  the traditional alphabet beginning with "A is for Apple" has been revamped to reflect the current issues of the day.  these have been personally approved and contributed to by or beloved GWB.  starting in september, the new letter/word association will be as follows:

A is for anthrax
B is for bomb
C is for communist
D is for dirty bomb (extention of letter b, since they look the same)
E is for evil
F is for foreigners
G is for grenade
H is for Hezbollah/Hamas/Hussein
I is for Iraq/Iran/illegal immigrants
J is for Jar Jar Binks, because he encouraged the use of the Storm Troopers who eventually exterminated the Jedi
K is for Kim Jong Il
L is for Lebanon
M is for ManBearPig
N is for NAMBLA
O is for Osama
P is for pox, whether it be small or chicken
Q is for questioning authority
R is for rabies
S is for scientology
T is for Tom Cruise
U is for underpants gnomes
V is for viagra
W is for witches/warlocks
X is for xylophone...an evil xylophone (since e and x are commonly put together)
Y is for yellow fever
Z is for Zartu, 3rd overlord of Nelvon 7

the purpose of this updated alphabet, of course, is to make the children scared shitless of the alphabet, spelling, and words in general.

i move to port jeff tomorrow.  also, my cousin kaitlin got engaged, so congrats to her.  the wedding is circa spring/summer 2008.

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