My mom got my daughter a diary to write in. Some of the pages are pre-printed to start my
daughter out. One of such pages includes
a place to write down someone’s name and write 3 words to describe them. For me, my daughter wrote “nice,
housework”. She counted “housework” as
two words because it’s a compound word.
7-year-olds, am I right? So, I
have been regulated to “domestic servant” status in my daughter’s eyes. It gets worse. The 3 words she wrote describing my wife were
“addicted to phone”. I am not making
that shit up. Thanks for the diary, mom.
I’m surprised that Trump has not blamed Hurricane Dorian on the fake
news liberal media.
I secretly wished that Hurricane Dorian would destroy Mar a Lago.
Isn’t it great that when a person who works a traditional day job needs
something done, everyone or every place who can do it is only open during those
normal business hours? I haven’t been to
a dentist in a couple of years, and it has nothing to do with a fear of
inflicted tooth pain. It is because
dentists are closed by the time I get out of work.
I find it surreal that there are ceremonies to remember September 11,
2001 held in South Carolina. Dude, it
was a plane in PA, the Pentagon, and the Twin Towers. I don’t see first responders in SC protesting
lack of healthcare because they got mesothelioma from something that happened
18 years ago 700 miles away. That’s
because they weren’t anywhere near it.
I’m pretty sure most of this remembrance bullshit only comes from people
with a media outlet. There simply cannot
be enough people that were directly impacted from that day to warrant seeing it
blasted on TV and the internet. I can
understand my FB connections who are from NY doing it, but not a SC
municipality or TV station. I don’t see
people around my job doing that shit because they’re a lot smarter.
If you get a medical device implanted inside you, and it is later
removed because it fell out, hurt too much, or broke, shouldn’t you get your
money back? If you go for therapy, but
the therapy doesn’t work, shouldn’t you get your money back? I may be wrong, but I think the healthcare
industry is the ONLY industry in which you pay for something and then do not
get a refund if that something didn’t work.
I pissed off my wife when she had an IUD removed because “it moved” and
I asked if we were getting our $750 back.
This was years ago, and I still don’t know why she was the one pissed off about me saying that.
Today, I caught someone on FB messenger pretending to be someone they
are not. This is one of those few times
where it is PERFECTLY acceptable to stereotype a group of people based on their
English language usage and comprehension.
“I just wanna share a good news with you which help me recover and
financially okay now”. “News” isn’t
singular, and he was always financially ok.
The person they were pretending to be is a former coworker of mine, and
in my experience, he is an asshole. I
know this because I am an asshole. There
was no way he could be in the position he was in and write that sentence with
his grammar and his facts wrong. Therefore,
when receiving messages about being “extremely happy for [his] life has
experienced with a graceful turn around” and his wishing “God continue to
shower his blessing upon [me]”, I knew something was off. I asked him, at first, politely to tell me
where we knew each other. He said he saw
me on his friends list. I said that wasn’t
specific enough. I asked him a 2nd
time with an air of finality, and a threat to block him, where he met me. He said on Facebook. I exclaimed “WRONG!!”, reported him, and
blocked him.
I’d like to write about a topic I’ve briefly touched upon before: impeachment.
As I am typing this paragraph, the US House of Representatives opened an
impeachment investigation. To be honest,
I had to remind myself of the whole impeachment process, so I knew not to get
my hopes up prematurely. In short, there
are 3 steps. Step 1 is the investigation
done by a congressional committee. Step
2 is that the House of Representatives votes based on the investigation whether
to impeach. A simple majority is
required for that. Step 3 is the
impeachment trial done by the Senate, and (here’s the difficult part) a 2/3
supermajority “guilty” verdict is required to convict. We in the US are currently veeeeerrrrry early
in step 1.
I have previously stated that I would prefer the screaming toupee be
voted out of office than impeached, with the reason being that Pence would take
over the job as the result of conviction.
Since the US House of Representatives has a majority of its members
aligned with the opposite political party as the President, there is actually a
legitimate possibility that steps 1 and 2 could be done. What is going to be difficult is getting 2/3
of Senators to vote guilty in the impeachment trial. Maybe you’ll get half. To get 2/3, it would be required for about
40% of Republican Senators to vote against their politically aligned Commander
in Chief. I’m not sure there is a
reasonable person that can honestly argue that is possible right now. All of those Senators’ noses are so brown
from kissing and rimming Dumbo Trump’s asshole because of his money and his
influence over the retards that elected them that they won’t risk their
political power. It may need something
really bad to happen to sway that many Senators, something way beyond political
corruption. Maybe Donald has to set his
3rd mother-in-law on fire.
Maybe the FBI will find his semen and orange pubic hair on a dry, crusty
American flag. Maybe he’ll pull a
Geraldo Rivera and leak some troop positions to enemy combatants. Until such a time that many Republican
Senators can be swayed, the best thing to do is shame them forevermore when
they vote “not guilty”. To me, the most
likely positive consequence of completing an impeachment trial is to get
everyone on the record for if they condone obstruction of justice and
soliciting a foreign power to interfere with potential political rivals. I don’t think the Senate would convict, but
getting everyone on the record is the best we can hope for, and really all we
can hope for. If by some miracle Trump
is impeached and convicted right before Election Day 2020, maybe it will be
hard for Pence to be elected to take his place.
Honestly, I don’t know. People
are so fucked up and stupid I can believe anything at this point. It makes Santa Claus/Easter Bunny 2020 look
like a probability. Democrats, don’t
fuck this up. Remember John Kerry? No?
Exactly my point!
I’m really happy that Twitter posts are not legal doctrine. I don’t have a Twitter account, but some
buttfuckers in the news and on the internet think it is important to relay what
elected officials, and “elected” officials (fucking electoral college…), have
to say in their limited text box with all of their pound signs. Yes,
assholes. I’m calling them pound
signs. That’s what it is when I need to
make a payment to a doctor’s office over the phone, call customer service overseas
because my sprinkler is spraying water out everywhere except the nozzle, or bitch and moan at the post office when the
package I’m tracking is going in the opposite direction. It’s not called “hashtag”; it’s a pound
sign. Anyway, back to my original gripe,
it seems inherently retarded when people who have been elected to legally
represent us in government and make decisions on our behalf use a
communications medium that has a limit on how many characters can be typed in
at once. That sounds like some 1984
bullshit trying to dumb down the country by dumbing down the language. I’m not falling for it. However, to be honest, I am all for limiting
the terms of elected officials, both their time spent in office and the
monumentally stupid words that come out of their heads. I just would have preferred a shock collar or
a mute button hooked up to their vocal chords over a text field with limited
space. Thomas Jefferson should rise from
the dead and slap his decomposing penis across the face of every single federal
government official who has a Twitter account, then stab Trump in the ear with
the same quill he used to finish the Declaration of Independence. That’s
how you make a fucking doctrine.
I feel bad for conservative women.
I feel that way because I know that women are objectively smarter than men, so I think these cunts must have had something
truly sadomasochistic happen to them by some stupid mongoloid of a conservative
male influence to fuck up things for them for the rest of their lives. Only that would let them willingly give up
their rights over their bodies and submit to cultural gender expectations.
Twice in the past year, I have sat with my wife having drinks at a
lesbian bar with a girl-girl couple, different couple each time, and one of
them at each time had been drunk enough to say to me, louder than normal due to
the alcohol, “YOU ARE SUCH A GOOD GUY!”
I sit there thinking, “Where were you as my wingman when I was
single?!” On the bright side, it is good
to know that I am still acceptable by lesbian standards.
I definitely do not “work hard, play hard”. I “work hard, pass out”.
On the day I am writing this paragraph, President Donald Trump is in
the beginnings of an impeachment inquiry by the US House of Representatives,
which he recently referred to as a lynching, and is visiting Benedict College
in Columbia, SC. I work very close to
the airport into which he is being flown.
The local news outlets did not fail to notice that he planned on
speaking to a historically black college days after his “lynching”
comment. I’m sure the friendly locals
and those who attend the college will remind him what the definition of a
lynching is. Some people hoping to be
Democratic candidate are speaking tomorrow.
At each event, tickets are $45 and there is a question/answer
phase. So someone has to pay money to
either gripe at or praise the person talking during a Q&A about criminal
justice reform. Being in the south, I am
not surprised that the news reported Drumpf’s session is sold out.
I find it stupid that the US Senate can vote to make a resolution to
condemn the impeachment inquiry underway by the other house of Congress. Doesn’t that mean that they can just resolute
the fuck out of each other, since resolutions and condemnations have no actual
consequence other than being on legal record?
That is akin to my wife and I kids calling each other poopy-butt
and toilet-baby back and forth all day long.
Recently, I’ve been cutting off alcohol consumption at home and in
public. This posed a culinary challenge
to be because I consider my self a beer snob and like to try different
varieties from different sources.
However, I think I can find a way to compensate for that: coffee.
I’m thinking about eventually becoming a coffee snob. I am, unfortunately, unwilling to install a
quality espresso machine in my house since that will run me a few hundred
dollars. I can still try new coffees,
whole bean or ground, carafe or Keurig.
On a positive side, I cannot get in trouble for doing this recreationally
at work.
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